this mountains high

a thought by a good friend Jono, followed by my response and perpetual struggle:

"God speaks, I know it, but the volume is directly proportional to our listening. Each time I listen, I hear Him, but then He introduces something else in me that needs to change, and I again need to ramp up that following and listening. If He's told you that you are soft, cruel, or selfish, then you have your next assignment. The terraces on God's mountain are very narrow. Just wide enough to allow for a moment of thanksgiving before we need to start climbing again. We find it easy to get used to things, to become accustomed to blessings and not appreciate them. God is infinite and the climbing will continue indefinitely but the moment we stay at one level for to long, we get used to it and we aren't as thankful for it. Gotta keep on moving, it's not like we're going to hit the top, God is infinite. Just thoughts which came to mind. I dunno if they're relevant or not."

relevant atleast to me.

often i find myself stopping and become apathetic towards moving again. it's comfortable where i am. if this mountain is so infinite, why should i keep trying to reach the top? reaching a clearing in the clouds only to find that there is so much further to go is scary. it brings too much of my incompetence and inability to the surface. why dare take another step? i could build a pretty little cottage and live right here until the end. but then occasionally i feel something prodding me - nagging me to keep going up and up and up...

if only i could make out the path i'm to follow.

expedite this

i found the electric fireplace i want and likely we will get:





















only $150 from home depot.

yes, we will have a place to hang our stockings and not just over the tv!

dilemmas... i hate being in the waiting stage. our car, my raise, decorating, renovating, anticipating the future... but i hate waiting so much so i can't even bear to write about it.

anyone else have this blogging problem? so much on your mind that you can't even begin to display it in words so you just don't.

someone please buy me a fireplace

Christmas time is here
Happiness and cheer
Fun for all that children call
Their favorite time of the year

Snowflakes in the air
Carols everywhere
Olden times and ancient rhymes
Of love and dreams to share

Sleigh bells in the air
Beauty everywhere
Yuletide by the fireside
And joyful memories there

Christmas time is here
We'll be drawing near
Oh, that we could always see
Such spirit through the year
Oh, that we could always see
Such spirit through the year...

i know, i know. it's only october. i don't care. i love christmas.
joy to the world
i played the charlie brown christmas soundtrack at work last week and people were smiling.
fine, they were likely laughing at me, but they were still smiling.
joy joy joy